I have CONQUERED my to-do list! It's almost back to normal size!
We did have the Emergency Drill, finally. My elevator monitors hung out at the stairs until it was time for them to go down, and my searchers just kind of disappeared, so...go team. On the other hand, the consultants the building hires to give us a brief safety lecture after evacuation apparently listened to the complaints they kept getting and this time did not give the speech about wearing sensible shoes to evacuate while singling out women in high heels for mockery.
One of our staff just flatly refused to evacuate, which I've never seen happen before. He started a print job after the alarms went, and then stood by the copier and refused to leave. I left Facilities arguing with him (remember that job I almost took? The guy who did take it was the one I left to try and convince him, SO GLAD I did not take that job) because there is only one thing more petty and childish than refusing to evacuate, and that's trying to force that douchebag to evacuate.
I just made sure everyone I spoke to for the rest of the day knew he refused to go while they had to. He's been an entitled jerk as long as I've known him, and everyone else confirmed my opinion. Also, if the building ever does catch on fire, I'm not dragging his ass down the emergency stairs.
(That's a lie. I totally will, and I will feel smugly superior while doing it, and I will not be careful about avoiding banisters.)